When the Leader Is Tired: A Heart Cry in the Middle of the Storm

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Being a leader in my church — guiding people, discipling them, helping them grow — is one of the greatest honors of my life. But sometimes, that responsibility feels heavy. Sometimes, being the one who encourages others means people forget that leaders get tired too.

And today… I’m tired.

I’m a mom of three. I’m running a business. I’m trying to keep my home together, keep my children fed, keep my spirit strong, and serve God with everything in me. Most days, I don’t know how I do it except for one truth:
If I didn’t have God, I would not cope.

But today, as I sit here looking at my home — messy from a busy weekend — with payday still not here, and my heart feeling stretched thin… I feel overwhelmed. And a quiet question whispers:

“Does anyone care about me?”

I know God does.
I know He sees me.

But when you’ve been praying for financial help all month and nothing seems to shift… it’s hard. When you’re budgeting as tightly as you can, and still a few school items cost over R1000, it’s hard. Prices keep rising. Needs keep rising. And the pressure? It sits heavy on my chest.

I try to be wise with money. I try to plan. But sometimes no matter how hard you try, the numbers don’t add up — and you end up with more debt, more stress, more weight to carry. And as a mom, watching other parents buy beautiful gifts for their kids while your budget is R200 each… it hurts. Not because you’re ungrateful, but because you want to give your children the world.

And yet — I still trust God.

I still believe He is for me.
I still believe He sees every tear, every sacrifice, every whispered prayer.

But some days, my faith feels stretched thin.
Some days I ask, “Lord, where is my breakthrough?”

I’m praying for a car so I can attend more church events, serve better, and even bring others with me who have no transport. I want to do more for God. I want to live purposefully. I want to finish my book. I want to raise my kids with joy, not stress. I want to breathe again.

But life feels like a constant race — and I’m running with tired legs.

And then the enemy whispers:
“Maybe you’re not doing enough.”
“Maybe God is mad at you.”
“Maybe you’ve failed somewhere.”

But deep down, another voice rises — soft, gentle, steady:

“Child, I am not angry.
I have not forgotten you.
Your story is not finished.”

I am learning that being overwhelmed doesn’t mean I lack faith.
Being tired doesn’t mean I am failing.
Being stretched doesn’t mean God has abandoned me.

It simply means I am human — and I am carrying a big calling.

So today, this is my heart cry.
A messy, honest, vulnerable prayer from a woman who loves God and is still learning to breathe in the storms:

“Lord, I trust You.
Even here.
Even now.
Even when I don’t see breakthrough yet.
Strengthen me to keep going.”

I don’t have all the answers.
I don’t have perfect faith.
I just have a heart that keeps trying.

And sometimes — that is enough.
Hello, I’m a mom of four as a self-employed business owner, I’ve learned how to juggle many roles, often feeling stretched thin, but my faith has always been a source of strength and guidance. Life hasn’t always been easy—marriage struggles and personal challenges have tested me, but each experience has deepened my faith and understanding of who I am. This blog is a space where I share my heart, my journey, and the lessons I’m learning along the way. I hope my story can offer encouragement and connection to theirs walking their own paths of faith and growth.

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